i cannot give up on myself.

i make sure the husband’s clothes are clean, his dry cleaning is done, yet i leave my clothes in unfolded heaps, searching for clean socks each morning, running down to the dryer in a towel looking for clean underwear.

i buy my niece elaborate gifts of new clothes, handmade quilts, all natural shampoos and bath soap, yet I talk myself out of investing in my wardrobe and only buy ill-fitting pieces on final sale.

i make sure my cats are fed and supplied with fresh water each morning, but i run off to work without healthy, satisfying food for the day. i manage their intake but allow mine to go unchecked.

i sit at my desk to complete an urgent task for a co-worker while i wait to take a much needed bathroom or water break, putting their urgent needs before my own.

i cannot give up on myself.  i give of myself to everyone but me.  i deserve my attention.  i cannot give up on making myself happy.